No6_Volume5.pdf

NO. 6 | Asano Atsuko

Volume 5

I can't... see.... Don't... come... near me....

CHAPTER 1

A Prayer Yonder

Good fortune, then,

To make me blest, or cursed'st among men!

- The Merchant of Venice Act II Scene I

Shion.

She tried to call to him. But her voice would not come out. Her tongue would not move.

Her arms and legs were heavy as if they had been bound in shackles, and she could not get

them free. Shion didn't turn around. His back, clad in a white shirt, moved further and further

away. Around them was darkness. An inky black darkness spread out all around. There was not

even the smallest ray of light.

Shion, wait. You can't go.

Turn around. Come back home. Don't go any further.

The darkness shifted. It bristled slimily and reared like something alive, and swallowed

the retreating white back whole.

Shion!

A shriek tore through her throat. Terror turned into vicious pain as it raced through her

whole body. She tried to leap into the darkness after Shion, but her body would still not move.

She couldn't take a single step forward.

Someone―someone help me. Stop him.

"Karan."

"Ma'am!"

She heard voices. Someone was holding her hand. She was shaken lightly.

"Karan, can you hear me? Can you hear my voice?"

"Ma'am, wake up!"

The voices had strength. The darkness was brushed away from her eyes, and her vision

lightened into a dim haze.

Oh―I hear you. I do hear you.

Karan opened her eyes. Her vision was blurry, like there was a veil being draped over it.

Two hazy faces―one of a tan man and one of a girl―were peering into her face. But they were

fleeting. She felt like if she blinked, they would ripple and shimmer, and disappear.

She could smell bread. Butter rolls, with ample butter kneaded into the dough. Come

evening, Lost Town residents would flock to Karan's bakery for her affordable and delicious

breads: labourers, after a long day's toil; hungry students; children with loose change in their

fists―for these poor customers, she had set the oven to finish baking at 5 o'clock sharp. It

looked like the outdated oven had functioned properly―the dozen or so butter rolls were

finished and ready.

NO. 6 | Asano Atsuko

Volume 5

For Karan, the aroma of baking bread was the aroma of life itself. The savoury smell,

now long familiar to her nose, yanked Karan energetically back into the real world.

The veil was thrown off. The outline of two faces flew clearly into her vision.

"Lili... Yoming..."

"Looks like you've come to," Yoming heaved a relieved sigh. Thank goodness , his lips

moved. "Can you get up? You don't have to force yourself."

"Yes―I'm... I'm fine."

Yoming supported her while she raised her upper body. She had been lying on an old

sofa in a corner of her workspace.

"I... went unconscious..."

"Yeah," Yoming said. "Behind the display case there, you just kind of crumpled to the

ground. I was so startled. My heart's still going a mile a minute."

Yoming flashed a relieved smile. Karan tried to smile back, but her cheeks were stiff, and

didn't move the way she wanted them to.

"Ma'am!" Lili threw herself at Karan and clung to her neck. Her eyes were brimming

with tears. "Ma'am, you're okay, right? You're okay now?"

Lili pressed her cheek against Karan's neck. It was wet. The arms that clung to her were

trembling as well. The little girl's tears were warm. They were almost hot. Normally she would

gently embrace the little girl, but Karan's arms would still not move as she wanted them to.

They were still heavy, and she felt like she was still clawing about in her dream.

Shion.

She wanted to tear her hair out. She felt like she would go insane. Right this moment,

what if Shion was heading to a place where his mother's hands could never reach? What if he

was descending into the depths of hell?

If he is, if that's really happening, what am I to do? What should I...

"Oh!" Lili gasped softly, and drew away from Karan. "They're little mousies!"

A little brown mouse was sitting on the spice shelf. Another grey one poked its furry

face out from beside it.

"Hey, there's two." Lili raised two fingers. Were they siblings? The two mice blinked their

very similar grape-coloured eyes, and huddled together.

One had brought her Shion's letter. But what about the other one?

"Lili, can you bring me a tiny piece of cheese from the fridge? It's in the bottommost

drawer."

"Okay."

Karan extended her hand up to the mice on the shelf, gently, but with as much strength

as she could. The tips of her fingers trembled. The two mice looked at each other, and busily

twitched their whiskers.

Cheep-cheep.

One of them encouraged the other, and the encouraged one turned to face Karan. It had

such small eyes, but they were eyes that showed intelligence. These mice possessed intellect.

They could understand human language and emotions.

Karan reached out further. She turned her palm upwards.

Cheep. Cheep.

NO. 6 | Asano Atsuko

Volume 5

The grey one slipped forward. Without a minute of hesitation, it jumped down onto her

palm. It shook its head side-to-side, and spat a small capsule out of its mouth. It was her second

letter today.

"Ma'am, are you gonna give the cheese to the mousies?"

Karan nodded at Lili, and opened the capsule. It wasn't Shion's writing. But she

remembered seeing it before. It was the writing that had extended a hand to Karan and pulled

her up when she had been wallowing in the depths of despair, after Shion was taken away by

the Security Bureau. It was the beautiful, flowing hand that showed its owner's intelligence and

resilient will. She could never forget this writing.

Reunion will come.

Nezumi

The short sentence didn't even add up to a tenth of his last note, but Karan was able to

heave a sigh of relief. A cool, soothing breeze blew through her body. The obstruction in her

chest, her airway, cleared somewhat.

Oh, I can breathe.

It was too early to despair. She could not lose hope yet.

"Nezumi..." She found herself saying his name out loud. For an instant, she felt like

someone had put an arm around her shoulders. Although she couldn't see it, she could feel

strong and supple arms supporting her.

Reunion will come. Whatever happens, I will bring Shion back to you alive. This I promise.

She could hear a low voice whisper at her ear. She breathed deeply again.

Nezumi was there. Always, at any time, he would be by Shion's side. Her boy was not

alone.

"Karan, what's that?"

Yoming was peering into Karan's hand.

"A letter."

"Letter? Do the mice deliver the post where you live?"

"They do," she smiled. "And it's handwritten, too. Isn't it so much more delightful than

electronic mail?"

Now she could smile. Yoming and Lili looked at each other, and the corners of their

mouths turned up as well. Lili, who was breaking the cheese and feeding it to the two mice,

came up to Karan and buried her cheek into Karan's bosom. This time, Karan could finally put

her arms around her properly.

"I was scared," Lili mumbled tearfully. "I was scared that... you wouldn't move at all

anymore... like Daddy... I was scared. Really scared."

"Daddy? Did something happen to your Daddy, Lili?"

"My Daddy before. My real Daddy."

"What?"

Yoming shook his head slightly.

"Lili's current father is Renka's second husband―she remarried."

"So Getsuyaku-san is..." Karan trailed off. "―I see."

She conjured to mind the long, thin face with drooping eyebrows. Now that Yoming had

NO. 6 | Asano Atsuko

Volume 5

mentioned it, she realized he and Lili were not alike at all in facial structure or body type. But

she never felt anything strange about seeing them walking hand-in-hand, or coming to buy

bread together. They were a happy family, father and daughter who truly got along. After Shion

had disappeared, she felt a twinge of pain in her heart at times when she saw Getsuyaku and

Lili together. She was both saddened and envious.

"Then Lili's father..."

"He passed away a few years back."

"A little before you moved in here, ma'am," Lili chimed in. "But you know, I love my new

Daddy too. He's really funny. He always makes me laugh."

Lili lifted her chin, and a grin spread across her face. It was a bright smile of relief as she

confirmed that Karan could speak properly, feeble though it was.

"I never knew. Renka never mentioned anything."

"She probably didn't want to," Yoming said. "They're painful memories for her."

The words had probably slipped without him knowing. Yoming gave a deep sigh. Lili

began to speak.

"One day when we were eating together, Daddy stopped moving. He said, 'I can't

breathe' and fell out of his chair. And I don't know why, but he stopped moving after that."

Lili's body began to shake, as memories of her younger days began to come back to her.

Karan slid her gaze to Yoming. She questioned him with her eyes.

What is this about?

"Lili's father―died, before her eyes," Yoming said hesitantly, casting his eyelashes down.

"No," he then said momentarily. "He was murdered."

"Murdered!"

The frightful word overlapped with the image of Shion's retreating back. Karan found

herself clenching her fists so hard that her nails were digging into her palms.

"Lili's father―his name was Suifu―was a construction worker, and a giant of a man

who was proud of his strength, and rightly too," Yoming said.

"Mommy says he was really kind, strong, and cool. He was really in love with Mommy,

right?"

Yoming smiled wryly.

"I think Renka's prettying it up a bit too much, even for a story to tell her daughter. Suifu

was a big drinker and a loose spender, so they were always getting into fights. But, well, he was

a nice guy, and worked hard for his family. He was a boisterous one, and liked to sing. When

he'd get drunk, he'd always sing in that booming voice. Yeah," he nodded. "He was a good guy.

He certainly did love his family very much."

"But he was... killed?"

"Indirectly."

"Indirectly..." Karan repeated. "Yoming, will you explain in a way I can understand?"

Yoming drew up a battered chair, and sat down. With his right hand, he gently stroked

Lili's hair. It was a gesture that showed how much Yoming cared for and cherished his niece.

"Explain so you understand, huh... if only it was as easy as that. There are so many

things I still don't know, that it's hard to even tell in proper sequence."

Yoming always spoke in a muddled way, and often ended his sentences awkwardly. But

NO. 6 | Asano Atsuko

Volume 5

nevertheless, he groped for the right words, and began to weave the story in fragments.

"Suifu, back then, was involved in the construction of a certain building. He was a

construction worker."

"A certain building..."

"Yeah. But we still don't know what building it was. I heard even Suifu didn't have an

idea what it was. He used to be taken to the construction site in a windowless van―he couldn't

see anything outside."

"Then to silence him―?"

"No, Karan, that couldn't be it. Suifu took his assigned job seriously, but he wasn't

interested at all in what he was building. He didn't care which part of the city this building was

in, or what it was going to be used for. Even if he was interested, it wasn't a kind of secret that a

construction worker could sniff out. It was put under skilful concealment. Right after Suifu

died, I did some footwork of my own trying to find out where this brother-in-law of mine used

to work, but to no avail. Open disclosure doesn't exist in a city like this. If the authorities

wanted it concealed, there would be nothing we citizens could do against it, anyway. There

shouldn't have been any need to go as far to kill Suifu to hide a secret."

"Then... what did he die of?"

"Outwardly they're saying it was a heart attack. But I can't bring myself to believe that

Suifu could have had one. It's as likely as a duck drowning in a pond."

"So it must mean there's something else to it."

"Yeah..." Yoming sealed his lips gravely, and cast his gaze around the room.

"It's alright," Karan reassured. "We're not being tapped."

"Is that so." Yoming paused. "I'm sorry," he said abruptly, "being all furtive like this. It's

shameful."

"No, not at all."

Were they really free from tapping devices? Frankly, Karan wasn't completely sure. The

authorities possessed enormous power. They could do anything if they wished to. It should be

no large feat for them to tap all citizens' conversations and manage that information.

But even so.

Karan grasped the memo tightly in her hand.

She would accomplish nothing if she kept shrinking back from fear. Instead of being

afraid, sealing my lips, plugging my ears―let me speak, let me listen. She would say it out loud; she

would tilt an ear to listen. To her it seemed like it was the only option left.

Karan leaned forward determinedly to the man and his roundabout words.

"And this 'something else' that you were talking about?"

Yoming blinked just once. Then, he stared straight into Karan's eyes.

"All of this is speculation. But if I tell you, I might end up loading you down with a

burden."

"I want to hear about it, and this is from my own will."

She tried spurring Yoming on.

"You went and you investigated your own side of the truth. You said you barely know

anything, but knowing you, you've probably at least gotten a clue. You've grasped something ,

haven't you? A hint―it might be thinner than a thread, but something to lead you to the truth?"

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