Arrows of Desire 04.pdf

ARROWS OF DESIRE 4

APRIL 1990

Contemporary note: As with AoD #1 and #3 , the text of the originals was here too faint to scan

well, so has been retyped. The font has been changed, but the layout is still the same. The

bottom edges of cover and bacover’ are missing due to paper size alteration. (Nic Farey,

December 2008)

HATE, FEAR AND LOATHING

TELL ME ABOUT IT

S V O’Jay

HATE, FEAR AND LOATHING

J Summers

GOOD INTENTIONS

Kiki

KILLING A CHILD

S V O’Jay

LOATHING AND LITIGATION

TEXTBOOK OF GREEN

DF Lewis

HATE AND FEAR AT THE MOVIES

WHAT IS IT YOU’RE AFRAID OF?

Maureen Porter

WHY?

Barbara

PASS THE SICK-BAG, ALICE

HATESEEKER

Patrick McKay

HOW PETHERIDGE DIED

S V O’Jay

FEAR AND LOATHING IN HATE CITY Storm Constantine

GREAT HATE FIGURES OF FANDOM

HFL PLAYLIST

Compiled by S V O’Jay and Rod Summers

THE REST

LOCO CITATO

CONTRIBUTORS

AND FINALLY...

For No-one

TELL ME ABOUT IT

S V O’Jay

Did you ever get that, you know, walking along the street or something, and you feel

like a tap on your shoulder maybe, so you turn around as fast as ever you can, but

there’s nobody there. Nobody.

So you stop looking, don’t you. After the fourth or fifth time of seeing empty street in

all directions, you just stop looking. One time I got tapped twice in two minutes, you

know, and then on the third tap a voice said “Hey”, real soft, you know, and I looked

and it was a nightstick doing the tapping with an ugly bastard cop behind it. Damn

near crapped myself right there in the street. Papers, social security chit and all that,

okay? Of course, I started looking again after that, but not for long, you know. Not for

long.

Then they start talking to you for real, you know, so you look again a few times, but

you realise it’s just the same, so you start to listen. Bad mistake, you know. Ba-ad

mistake. So let me tell you about it.

The first few times it was just “Hey”, you know, just like the bastard cop. Wish it had

been, ‘cause I was ready for that after the first time. Then that turned into a quiet

laugh, you know, like a private joke. More of a chuckle, really. Then it really started to

talk, I mean really talk, but quiet, real quiet.

It sounded just like “You afraid?”. It was. Then it was “You real afraid?”. I was.

You start to wonder then, about all the stupid things you did as a kid, as a young man,

as a middle-aged man, Jesus, there were enough of them. You think maybe you should

go talk to a priest or something, you know, even though the closest you ever came to

the Catholic Church was reading those ads they used to put in the papers. You

sometimes wonder about all those people you hurt, I mean really hurt, especially the

strangers. You know, like whose cute little dog was that you splattered all over that

street? It might not have been so bad if you hadn’t stopped, but you did, didn’t you,

and picked up this thing like a scrap of doormat, thick with blood, and flung it into

that pile of trashcans. What was it, you were real scared, right, but mostly it was

disgust, yeah, right, self-disgust you know.

So then you really think, yeah, that’s what it is, you know, there’s a God of scraggy

puppy-dogs somewhere that sent this whatever-it-is down to scare the living shit out of

you, oh yeah. Then I thought it said “It’s not the dog”, and laughed again. So that

started me right off again. It wasn’t the dog. And while you’re still thinking, it steps up

a gear and says “It wasn’t Julie in school either” and really starts to laugh.

Well by this time, anyone who tries to tell me I wasn’t scared is a 24-carat bastard liar.

Am I scared? I am scared. Shitless.

So now we get faster, you know, like really on speed or smack or something so I start

to walk faster, you know, and as I get faster the whole thing starts to feel like it’s

breathing down my neck, you know, and laughing all the time that laugh, and it knows,

it knows, so I start to walk faster yet and I’m almost getting there but my lungs, you

know, my heart is kicking,

kicking right so I catch,

TELL ME ABOUT IT

S V O’Jay

stop

for

breath.

Breath. Br - br - bre - ath. Br - e - ath.

Breath.

Then I stand up. And listen. Where are you, you bastard.

WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU!!

Then it talks to me one last time. The very last time. It says “Run”. It says “Run, you

asshole, you motherfuckin sonofabitch. Run.” It laughs “Run”. Laughs.

So I ran.

Right off the edge of the fuckin world.

HATE, FEAR AND LOATHING*

Jayle Summers

Sleeping Monkeys meet the inquisition of ? -

(These are the Prescriptions of the Finite.)

The Mummy/Daddy-fiction of Lord and Lady Eatshit.

Truth and Reactions: the band, play on/off.

Thought is tension is thought.

Neuro-sensate-muscular.

And the Word became Flesh...

“I heartily recommend Endorphin, the Purgative for the Interpretive!!!”

A Zombie Birdbrain Production.

Directed by Reilly Fucht.

*Q. What do these three words have in common?

(Clue - Who is mapping whose territory?)

What’s attempting to be communicated here? Well, there may be an answer in the

question. What is the commonest fear? Nuke-out? Embarassment? Poverty?

Imprisonment? Insanity? Violence? Death..? (“Hell no, I ain’t afraid of death!”)

“What do you know about death?”

No matter how rationally you approach the big D it remains UNKNOWN. Possibly

unknown No 1; others being fairly tangible, open to “reasonable” theorising in

comparison. So where are we, here and now head on with the Unknown?

Fear is imprinted on the beholder in various ways at various times to various effect. So

it all comes down to THREAT. Fear is a result of Resisting the Threatening Factor; a-

and you can, in time, become what you resist.

“What do you do for a living?”

You may have noticed the predominance of questions and statements without

“evidence”. We-ell as the philosopher Rainschild said before going superluminal, “It

ain’t what ya Figure Out, it(=X, by the way)’s what ya Configure In”.

“Are you, X?”

Everybody surviving this?

Do you detect and Hate or Loathing?

Yes No Other

(Please tick if you have one)

For more InFo: Master Therion, Wilhelm Reich, Bugs, Daffy, David Byrne, You, pope

Gregory XIII, A:.A:., Nos 2, 3 and 8, Suzuki, that person you always seem to notice but

don’t know why, Nic Roeg movies, Brian Eno and Ribofunk.

Iidog Suckin’ Precisely

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