05-Get Her Addicted.pdf

How To Create Lasting

Devotion For All 8 Types

part 5 f 8

Get Her Addicted

of the Pandora’s Ph.D.

Strategy Series

Vin DiCarlo

DiCarlo Coaching

Strategy Guide Written By Brian Burke

•

ONE GOAL

The Old Way

When you meet a woman you really like, do you know how to keep her? This

is a major challenge for most guys, probably second to approaching. The

reason for the struggle is that men treat “keeping” a woman as if they were

a running back trying to protect a football. It’s this jealous, hoarding, fearful

mindset that prevents men from being at their best when they get involved

with great women.

We always talk about the beliefs behind mindsets. The belief driving the

mindset of “keeping her” is that she a) doesn’t like you enough, and b) that it’s

your job to earn her time and attention. As you probably know by now, this is

the exact opposite of the dynamic you want with women. You want a woman

to already feel attracted to you so that you don’t have to work for her. You

want a woman to feel like she has to work for YOU.

This mindset reinforces a self-sabotaging belief and perpetuates the problem.

When you constantly try to second guess and pursue women, they run from

you, making you think that you must chase harder or smarter. It’s time to lip

the script.

The New Way

In order for a woman to feel attracted to a man, she must feel like he is the

prize, and that she is lucky to be a part of HIS life. Hearing this, the average

guy’s old beliefs will kick in: well that means I need to make more money,

wear cooler clothes, be funnier, grow a bigger dick.

False.

This is exactly the kind of thinking that turned the woman off in the irst

place. Remember, as men are attracted by how women look, women are

attracted to how men think.

So this is where we make the change. (The Attraction Code discussed this

in-depth so if you have not read it, you’re fucking up. Just kidding. But

seriously.)

You must begin to think like a dominant man, instead of a submissive man.

This applies to the content of your thoughts, but more importantly, the

direction of your thoughts. For example, let’s say you see a homeless person

on the street. When you pass him by, you can think about how much money

you will give him. This is a content-thought. But you could be giving him the

money because you are scared of looking selish, or because you want to help

a fellow human being. This makes a huge difference in your demeanor and

how others perceive you.

So the “direction” of your thoughts is like the “why.” In other words, your

intention, your meta direction, guides your thoughts, and thus your actions.

It can be hard to change your intention with women when you are lacking in

the dating department. You perceive a lack, and so you chase. This is why it’s

extremely important to take a step back and revamp your lifestyle before you

can expect a drastic change in your results with women.

Let’s say you’re dating a beautiful, fun, smart woman. You want to keep her

in your life. You are dealing with a whole new set of issues beyond “What do

I say to break the ice?” or “How do I get a conversation going?” She is asking

herself questions like, “Where is this going? Am I truly important to him? Do

we have a future? Do I want to be a part of that future?”

Devotion

Instead of focusing on winning women over, we will now focus on making

women devote themselves to us. This may sound like a large task. How can

you make a beautiful woman, who can date any man she wants, to devote

herself to you? The good news is she wants to , but most men won’t let her .

The bad news is you have to be going somewhere. Well actually that’s good

news, unless you want to spend the rest of your days working at Best Buy and

your only hobby is watching cable TV.

When your focus is devotion, you’ll ind you have more attractive women in

your life. This is because women can sense when a man has high standards. It

conveys that you are used to attractive women, and a generally good life.

Also, when you are no longer chasing women, you will ind that your

interactions with women, whether you just met or have been dating for a

while, are much more authentic. Think about how nervous and unnatural you

act when you are trying to get something from someone. Now think about

how conident and happy you are when you feel like you are bringing a lot

to the table.

Now what if what you brought to the table was a thought? The easiest thing

you can have is a thought, and yet that is what attracts women, and the more

powerful your thoughts, the better the women.

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