{1}{72}movie info: XVID 544x416 23.976fps 232.8 MB|/SubEdit b.4072 (http://subedit.com.pl)/ {1963}{1999}Quiet on the set. {2017}{2055}Deathly quiet. {2081}{2139}Fond felicitations, fiends... {2140}{2194}and welcome to the Crypt. {2196}{2261}Tonight's sordid saga|is about a couple of kids... {2263}{2305}with time to kill. {2317}{2400}See, they're just dying|to get into the horror movie business. {2402}{2513}And if they're lucky,|that's exactly what'll happen to them. {2532}{2564}Lights! {2581}{2648}Camera! Action! {2850}{2915}Damn! Shit! Son of a bitch! Fuck! {2923}{2966}What are you moaning about, Norm? {2968}{3015}There were 53 Junior Mints in this box. {3017}{3116}- There should be at least 54.|- Maybe you inhaled one by accident. {3148}{3218}Shit, Jess!|There's a whole pool of butter... {3220}{3251}down there at the bottom. {3252}{3282}What're you eating, Normie? {3284}{3325}There's nothing down there|but unpopped kernels. {3327}{3388}- Yeah, but that's the best part.|- Will you stop being a geek? {3390}{3420}- You're making me sick.|- Hey. {3422}{3459}I am not a geek, okay? {3465}{3501}A geek is somebody who... {3503}{3567}bites the heads off of chickens|and then drinks the blood. {3568}{3641}- You mean like you, Norm?|- No, I mean like your sister. {3643}{3670}Sure, buddy. {3680}{3751}- Jesus, Norman, you are so full of shit.|- Yeah, right. {3754}{3836}I saw Android Geeks From Hell|and the geeks in that movie did not bite- {3837}{3882}- What'd they do?|- They had this video vision... {3884}{3938}where they ripped the veins|right out of the chest... {3940}{4003}and used them like straws|to drink your blood. {4060}{4172}- That is really a geek.|- Look, those things were not geeks! {4174}{4221}Just because some stupid movie|says they're geeks... {4223}{4288}- doesn't make them geeks.|- Shut up. {4329}{4375}I'm not kidding, okay?|I know what geeks do. {4376}{4411}I read about them, all right? {4412}{4444}Where, in your stroke book? {4446}{4501}Hey, come on, man,|that's my mom's book, all right? {4512}{4604}- Your mom's stroke book!|- I mean it, all right? Take that back! {4682}{4735}- Did you see that?|- What? {4738}{4775}There's something out there. {4777}{4843}Oh, my God, you're right. It's a parking lot! {4845}{4873}Come on, man! {4880}{4931}- Shit, it's got a red eye.|- Like Predator, right? {4933}{4988}Come on, man. Look! {5339}{5381}Damn you, door! {5552}{5579}Fuck! {5619}{5688}- I got you, Normie!|- You son of a... {5758}{5794}You video... {5815}{5844}asshole! {6040}{6094}Did you see the look on Normie's face? {6096}{6140}You should have seen it, Normie.|It was great. {6142}{6182}I thought for sure|your eyes were gonna pop... {6184}{6208}right out of your head. {6210}{6248}Stop it, Josh. You didn't scare me, okay? {6250}{6332}Hey, guys, meet the star|of my new horror film... {6333}{6385}Chickenshit in the Alleyway. {6389}{6429}You didn't scare me, all right? {6431}{6526}Shit check! Hey, he's right guys. {6528}{6577}Nothing down there but dangleberries. {6579}{6606}Cut it out! {6623}{6731}Hey, tell me, rich boy, got the balls|to make a real horror film? {6738}{6810}- Yeah, film Normie eating a Twinkie.|- Yeah. {6816}{6840}Hey! {6861}{6896}Do you got them, huh? {6931}{6974}- A real horror film?|- Yeah. {7003}{7048}Yeah, sure. What do you got in mind? {7088}{7175}How would you like|to shake hands with a dead man? {7406}{7461}Damn. It's locked. {7520}{7570}We're gonna have to go|through the window. All right? {7572}{7613}Now, come on,|while there's no one around. {7615}{7685}You know what?|I'm not sure this is such a good idea. {7687}{7755}What's the matter?|Going pussy on us, Normie? {7761}{7799}Bite the bag. {7836}{7863}Come on! Come on! {7881}{7923}Did you ever think about going on a diet? {7924}{7972}- Shut up.|- Hurry up. {8044}{8095}You gotta watch that first step, Normie. {8096}{8144}- It's a killer.|- Very funny. {8150}{8200}- Come on. Come on.|- Hey. {8299}{8387}- Jesus, it's hot in here.|- It smells pretty disgusting, too. {8392}{8458}Wow! Hey, give me some more light, guys. {8540}{8591}What do you think that barber chair's for? {8593}{8635}Maybe Esbrook|gives them a shave and haircut... {8636}{8682}before he cuts them open. {8684}{8760}Oh, my God! What the hell is this? {8849}{8876}Hey, look! {8920}{8994}You think maybe there's a dead guy|underneath there? {8997}{9063}- Let's go take a look.|- You know my dad told me... {9065}{9150}Esbrook once covered|a dead writer's book in his own skin. {9152}{9212}What did he use as a bookmark? His dick? {9427}{9453}Wow. {9496}{9591}- That's Mrs. Groves, the librarian.|- Oh, shit! {9606}{9647}I'm gonna throw up. {9668}{9700}I didn't even know she was sick. {9720}{9774}God, she was such a nice old lady, too. {9816}{9870}- Oh, shit. Esbrook's back.|- Let's get out of here! {9872}{9921}No, wait! Hide! Hide! {10060}{10102}Get the fuck out of here! {10112}{10159}Norm, get over here. {10264}{10302}Get in. {10315}{10339}In here. {11228}{11298}Lucy? You're uncovered. {11738}{11784}Are you trying to get away from me... {11785}{11851}after all we meant to each other? {12140}{12199}You know, I never could understand... {12201}{12256}what you had against me. {12257}{12325}All those times you turned me down. {12374}{12458}Mine. All mine. {12538}{12639}Come on, old girl. Give us a smile. {12792}{12879}Come now. You can do better than that. {13434}{13516}There now. That's better. {13556}{13631}Now, what's this?|Is there something you want to tell me? {13726}{13802}Goodness! I let you lie around too long,|didn't I? {13811}{13895}You were going to purge|before I was ready. {13896}{13974}Oh, Lucy, Lucy, Lucy. {14041}{14112}I'm speechless. {14368}{14431}Oh, Lucy! {17846}{17893}Guys, come on. Let's go. {18049}{18074}What if somebody saw? {18076}{18128}Norm! Norm! {18133}{18202}...I thought that was my job.|What's the matter? You look sick. {18204}{18276}My stomach is a little upset.|I need some more paregoric. {18278}{18352}You know, there are|more modern remedies than paregorics. {18354}{18430}What can I tell you?|I'm just an old-fashioned guy. {18498}{18534}What are you doing here? {18568}{18601}I want my cut. {18604}{18696}From now on, I want to be paid|on the night before the funeral. {18697}{18752}You're right. You are paranoid. {18842}{18871}Here. {18989}{19104}- What the hell is this? $500?|- It's a $1,500 funeral. {19106}{19167}She's just a goddamn librarian,|for Christ's sake. {19169}{19260}After expenses, I'll be lucky|if I make half what you're making. {19262}{19311}Expenses. Don't give me that. {19313}{19379}You're gonna stick her|in a pressed oatmeal coffin. {19390}{19472}You want to make more money on this?|Next time you doctor a prescription... {19473}{19547}why don't you pick somebody|that can afford a deluxe funeral? {19548}{19611}As a matter of fact,|that's exactly what I did. {19627}{19726}I just sent some asthma medication|to a guy who can definitely afford... {19728}{19777}your top-of-the-line accommodations. {19779}{19803}Really? {19804}{19874}I had a feeling that would put a smile|on your face. {19879}{19946}And there's Richard Schwartzberg.|And I know he's not a rich guy... {19948}{19994}but you'll be seeing him soon. {20003}{20051}Okay. I'll send that paregoric. {20139}{20211}You guys, I'm not kidding.|That's what happened to Mrs. Groves. {20213}{20291}- Esbrook and this other guy killed her.|- Would you give me a break, Norm? {20292}{20367}Maybe they're right about masturbation.|Maybe it does rot your brain. {20368}{20455}Look, I'm serious, okay? This other guy's|a doctor, a pharmacist or something. {20456}{20522}He said he was gonna poison|some rich guy's asthma medication. {20524}{20556}Get a life, Normie. {20560}{20623}Hey, Josh, you're not going to believe|what Normnuts here says... {20624}{20655}happened to him last night. {20656}{20705}You know, after we left. {20809}{20859}My dad died last night. {20895}{20957}- What?|- How did it happen? {20992}{21084}- He had a asthma attack.|- Asthma? {21120}{21166}Did he take medicine? {21212}{21235}Yeah. {21300}{21351}Why? What is it? {21414}{21463}Josh, we gotta have a talk. {21548}{21640}See, Norm says that Esbrook,|you know last night in the mortuary... {21754}{21824}My name's Joshua Quan. My father... {21866}{21922}My father's been murdered|by the town's undertaker. {21924}{21964}Sebastian Esbrook. {21972}{22019}And the pharmacist at Grundy's Pharmacy. {22021}{22107}- Piece of shit who wears snakeskin shoes.|- We... {22219}{22289}Our mission is to try to get|all the evidence on tape that we can- {22291}{22348}- So we can fry this son of a bitch.|- Yep. {22364}{22450}We know some or all of us may be killed|by the time this is seen. {22466}{22557}I hope that whoever finds this tape|will bring it to the right person. {22572}{22600}Let's go, man. {22904}{22944}Is the pharmacist there? {22946}{23024}- Oh, shit, man. There's two of them.|- How are we gonna see their shoes? {23026}{23079}Ain't nothing to it. Watch this. {23104}{23134}I think it's that one. {23136}{23183}I bet he's got a. 38 on his ankle. {23184}{23252}- What about the other one?|- He's just an old fogy. {23336}{23425}- He boosted a skin mag.|- God, I hope it's better than my mom's. {23427}{23509}- God! They saw him.|- There he goes! {23560}{23635}- Jesus, they're stopping him.|- A regular kamikaze. {23657}{23717}Oh, right! The shoes. {23731}{23774}Damn it, neither one! {23813}{23856}- Got a new toy, boys?|- Oh, shit. {23919}{23951}Hi, Mr. Grundy. {23960}{24043}Why are you pointing your camera|into my store when there are so many... {24044}{24127}pretty girls out here on the street|for you to take pictures of? {24128}{24231}Norman, I'm glad you came by today.|I've got some deliveries for you to make. {24232}{24289}First one's for Sebastian Esb...
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