Bones [5x07] The Dwarf in the Dirt.txt

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[98][117]Hey,Booth,right?
[117][134]You're a legendary shot,man.
[134][153]- I'm Carson.|- I'm concentrating.
[153][190]I heard you could shoot a hole through|the middle of a dime on the run.
[378][400]Excuse me.
[400][432]I obviously got the wrong guy.
[512][539]Oh,great,I was worried you'd be gone.
[539][552]Uh,almost gone.
[552][590]Well,almost is almost,so if I ask you a|question,can you answer it in plain language?
[590][613]Yeah,I'll do my best.
[613][643]Great,so,um...
[655][672]Okay,what's our deal?
[672][682]Our deal?
[682][743]Yeah,yeah,what-what-what are you--|FBI shrink,friend,objective observer?
[743][765]O-O-Oh,you want to|know my primary role.
[765][782]Okay,well,that depends|upon a number of factors.
[782][825]Sweets.Plain language.
[825][863]The FBI hires me to evaluate|agents.You're an agent.
[863][897]So,FBI first,me second?
[897][913]No,no,no,Agent Booth,that's|not what I meant.
[913][925]It's okay,Sweets,I get it.
[925][949]- Please let me finish.|- You just called me Agent Booth.
[949][967]That's says it all,Dr.Sweets.
[967][996]You know,I learned the importance|of vocabulary choices from you,
[996][1016]and I got to go catch a murderer.
[1016][1044]Booth.
[1077][1089]Why aren't you cracking wise?
[1089][1118]Why?Because it's not 1945.
[1118][1135]Well,shall I start making jokes?
[1135][1152]Let's just let it flow|naturally,okay,Bones?
[1152][1217]I've noticed in the past when you're grumpy,your|mood tends to elevate when you tell me about it.
[1217][1236]Just had a bad day on the range.
[1236][1262]- Is that a cowboy metaphor?|- No,I...
[1262][1296]Look,next week,I have to|recertify as a marksman,and I...
[1296][1312]I don't know if I'm|gonna make the grade.
[1312][1340]Well,obviously you need more practice.
[1340][1364]Maybe this is all|because of my brain tumor.
[1364][1424]Highly unlikely,given that aiming a firearm|involves your cerebellum and occipital lobe,
[1424][1455]while your brain tumor|was temporoparietal.
[1455][1482]Perhaps you should speak to Sweets.
[1482][1513]Meaning what-- this|is psychological now?
[1513][1530]No,I...I can't talk to Sweets.
[1530][1549]- Why not?Why?|- Because he works for the FBI
[1549][1575]and he's going to go on to tell the|Bureau that I'm all loopity- doopity-doopy.
[1575][1588]I can't have that.Sinkhole?
[1588][1620]Oh,no,thanks,I already got|one.That's it over there.Big sucker.
[1620][1650]Let's not do that right|now,Officer Navarro.
[1650][1674]All business FBI.Got you.
[1674][1705]Road collapsed about 4:00|a.m.Broken water main.
[1705][1727]Took a car down with|it,but nobody got hurt.
[1727][1756]- Mostly pumped out now.|- Then why are we here?
[1756][1776]Because you're the bones people,right?
[1776][1805]We've got bones.
[1820][1845]Oh,they're...green.
[1845][1870]That is very interesting.
[1870][1890]- Be careful,Bones.|- They don't look right if you ask me.
[1890][1905]Why,because they look so green?
[1905][1934]Get closer.That's not all|that's wrong with them.
[1934][1987]Definitely human.The evidence down here|has been totally compromised by water.
[1987][1996]Is it a kid?
[1996][2023]Oh,you mean because of|the small stature?No.
[2023][2063]Dentition indicates late 20s,male.
[2063][2074]Why is he green?
[2074][2102]Well,that's not really|our highest priority.
[2102][2137]W-Wait,how can being green|not be a priority,Bones?
[2137][2170]Oh,a gold coin.
[2188][2208]Look at that,Bones.
[2208][2221]- What happened?|- Water main break.
[2221][2256]All right,got another water main break|down here.Well,look at that,Bones.
[2256][2292]You are at the end of|a beautiful rainbow.
[2292][2319]Where I am is at the|bottom of a muddy pit.
[2319][2367]Okay,think about it.End of a|rainbow,little green guy,gold coins.
[2367][2379]What does that tell you?
[2379][2416]That I need an umbrella and that|the remains are horribly compromised.
[2416][2445]It tells me leprechaun.
[2445][2459]Are you praying?
[2459][2483]- I'm making a wish.|- Same thing,really.
[2483][2519]Rather than counting on superstition|to make you shoot more accurately,
[2519][2549]you should just practice more.
[2549][2584]Thanks.Okay,why don't we just get|Darby O'Gill there out of the pit a
[2584][2607]nd back to the lab,all right?
[2607][2631]Somebody shut the water off!
[2631][2664]MAN: Let's go!Shut it down!
[2985][3033]Leprechauns are thought to explode|if you touch them with a broom handle.
[3033][3095]A These remains show no signs of being|exploded and B I think you can guess "B.
[3095][3115]" There are no such|things as leprechauns.
[3115][3136]This is good.We're|developing a shorthand.
[3136][3181]The large skull and|torso,combined with short limbs
[3181][3210]and evidence of hypotonia|points to achondroplasia.
[3210][3221]Dwarfism.
[3221][3236]Indeed.
[3236][3261]I think I know why our|victim's bones are green.
[3261][3287]This soil is lousy with iron oxides.
[3287][3324]That,combined with the acidic groundwater,turned|the calcium in the bones green.
[3324][3338]- How long would that take?|- It depends.
[3338][3363]How far down into the bone|does the green color extend?
[3363][3383]Two to three millimeters.
[3383][3397]I'm gonna go with two to five months.
[3397][3421]So we have time of death,if not cause.
[3421][3458]Most of the abrasions to these|bones were caused very recently.
[3458][3488]A car fell on the remains last|night.That's going to be a factor.
[3488][3548]The question is: how did our leprechaun|end up buried 20 feet under the street...
[3557][3575]wearing only his knickers?
[3575][3635]Most likely scenario is that he was murdered and|tossed in a storm drain,service tunnel or sewer.
[3635][3697]A 60% subluxation between the scapula and the humerus|indicates that his right shoulder was dislocated.
[3697][3715]Congruent with having been dragged?
[3715][3754]As a literal deadweight,yes.
[3786][3832]Firing two branzino,one|duck,one rib eye rare!
[3832][3854]Oh,and one of the|branzinos is without potato.
[3854][3890]Well,it's the customer's|loss,the vile bag of gob-slobber.
[3890][3907]So you prefer this to psychiatry?
[3907][3951]Agent Booth!Yes,yes,I|do,as a matter of fact,yes.
[3951][3963]Well,it's the smell.
[3963][4019]And plus,let's face it,Chef Gordon Gordon Wyatt has|more of a ring to it than Dr.Gordon Gordon Wyatt.
[4019][4039]What do you think?
[4039][4054]Wow,that's amazing.
[4054][4076]Isn't it?Isn't it?What|do I owe this pleasure to?
[4076][4118]- Well,listen...|- Careful with those morels,Elan.They're $60 a pound.
[4118][4132]- WOMAN: Sorry,Chef.|- Chef,I need some advice.
[4132][4186]Well,I can advise you on how to cook an omelet|or how to sous-vide a pork chop,if you want to.
[4186][4199]Yeah,go,go with those.
[4199][4223]No,I need some shrinky advice.
[4223][4255]Oh,I stopped being a psychiatrist|some time ago,as you know.
[4255][4295]Firing three halibut,two|shepherd's pie,one rack of lamb!
[4295][4335]Has this something to do with the jumbling|your poor boggled noggin got last year?
[4335][4347]That's what I'd like to know.
[4347][4417]Well,my brain expertise these days is confined to preparing|a superb sautéed cervelles au beurre noir,I'm afraid.
[4417][4445]Maybe you could just pretend like|I'm a recipe Go.that needs fixing.
[4445][4463]Tell you what.Take that.
[4463][4487]And that.Go over to that table.
[4487][4519]Chef's|table,somebody,please.Prepare,thank you.
[4519][4539]This...if I eat this,it's|going to cure me?
[4539][4568]Heavens,no,but it'll give you|something to do until my break.
[4568][4618]Right,somebody serve|these over here,thank you.
[4643][4668]The victim was struck in his face.
[4668][4699]At the nasal and the zygomatic.
[4699][4733]At worst,a blow like this would|knock the victim unconscious.
[4733][4777]A good find,Mr.Nigel-Murray,but|not cause of death.
[4777][4822]I've cataloged a large number of|remodeled fractures along the ribs,
[4822][4859]plus bilateral flattening|of the proximal radii.
[4859][4900]Enhanced muscle attachments here and|here indicate the victim was very strong.
[4900][4929]Well,I'd assume that was to|compensate for his condition.
[4929][4990]What if his strength wasn't compensation for|his condition but led to all of these injuries?
[4990][5054]A superstrong dwarf,such as might|be found in The Lord of the Rings?
[5054][5087]The victim has all of the|occupational markers of a wrestler.
[5087][5105]Oh,a midget wrestler?
[5105][5137]Midget is not the proper term.As|a scientist,you should be aware.
[5137][5168]It may not be the|proper term,Dr.Brennan,
[5168][5229]but I can assure you,correct or not,"midget|wrestling" is an American pastime...
[5229][5267]as wrong as that may be.
[5289][5327]I am trying to match the physical|characteristics of our leprechaun
[5327][5357]to any professional wrestlers|on the wrestling circuit.
[5357][5379]Wrestling is popular in many cultures.
[5379][5406]It was the supreme contest|in ancient Greek games.
[5406][5439]Well,those were mostly beautiful|boys wrestling around,all...
[5439][5463]- oiled up and naked.|- That could be our victim.
[5463][5519]The muscle development appears consistent,the|distinct curvature of the femur is undeniable.
[5519][5560]Then it seems our leading|contender is the Iron Leprechaun.
[5560][5588]- So it was a leprechaun after all.|- That's him.
[5588][5653]I'm fairly certain that Iron Leprechaun is not|his actual name but only his wrestling moniker.
[5653][5669]Thank you.
[5669][5699]Oh,no,well,this says that|he's wrestling tonight.
[5699][5731]That would mean that I was|wrong about him being the victim.
[5731][5754]Yeah,believe me,I'm as|surprised about it as you are.
[5754][5796]Perhaps this Iron Leprechaun|will be aware of someone else,
[5796][5833]who looked exactly|like him,disappearing.
[5838][5875]I could spend the rest of my life|analyzing the contents of that sinkhole....
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