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The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn
The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn
by
Mark Twain
Notice and Explanatory
Notice
PERSONS attempting to find a motive in this narra- tive will be prosecuted;
persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to
find a plot in it will be shot.
BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR,
Per G.G., Chief of Ordnance.
Explanatory
IN this book a number of dialects are used, to wit: the Missouri negro dialect; the
extremest form of the backwoods Southwestern dialect; the ordinary "Pike
County" dialect; and four modified varieties of this last. The shadings have not
been done in a hap- hazard fashion, or by guesswork; but painstakingly, and with
the trustworthy guidance and support of personal familiarity with these several
forms of speech.
I make this explanation for the reason that without it many readers would
suppose that all these characters were trying to talk alike and not succeeding.
THE AUTHOR.
HUCKLEBERRY FINN
Scene: The Mississippi Valley
Time: Forty to fifty years ago
Chapter 1
YOU don't know about me without you have read a book by the name of The
Adventures of Tom Sawyer; but that ain't no matter. That book was made by Mr.
Mark Twain, and he told the truth, mainly. There was things which he stretched,
but mainly he told the truth. That is nothing. I never seen anybody but lied one
time or another, without it was Aunt Polly, or the widow, or maybe Mary. Aunt
Polly -- Tom's Aunt Polly, she is -- and Mary, and the Widow Douglas is all told
about in that book, which is mostly a true book, with some stretchers, as I said
before.
Now the way that the book winds up is this: Tom and me found the money that
the robbers hid in the cave, and it made us rich. We got six thousand dollars
apiece -- all gold. It was an awful sight of money when it was piled up. Well,
Judge Thatcher he took it and put it out at interest, and it fetched us a dollar a
day apiece all the year round -- more than a body could tell what to do with. The
Widow Douglas she took me for her son, and allowed she would sivilize me; but
it was rough living in the house all the time, considering how dismal regular and
decent the widow was in all her ways; and so when I couldn't stand it no longer I
lit out. I got into my old rags and my sugar-hogshead again, and was free and
satisfied. But Tom Sawyer he hunted me up and said he was going to start a
band of robbers, and I might join if I would go back to the widow and be
respectable. So I went back.
The widow she cried over me, and called me a poor lost lamb, and she called me
a lot of other names, too, but she never meant no harm by it. She put me in them
new clothes again, and I couldn't do nothing but sweat and sweat, and feel all
cramped up. Well, then, the old thing commenced again. The widow rung a bell
for supper, and you had to come to time. When you got to the table you couldn't
go right to eating, but you had to wait for the widow to tuck down her head and
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